I finally figured out why writing query letters sucks (and I mean aside from the repeated stick-in-my-chest rejections): boredom.
I have sent out twenty slightly-modified versions of the same query letter as of last week and frankly I’m tired of it. In fact, I think I may have a brown on my hands.
Cows, after you’ve seen them for a while, are boring. They may be well-bred cows, Six Sigma cows, cows lit by a beautiful light, but they are still boring. A Purple Cow, though: Now, that would really stand out. The essence of the Purple Cow — the reason it would shine among a crowd of perfectly competent, even undeniably excellent cows — is that it would be remarkable. Something remarkable is worth talking about, worth paying attention to. Boring stuff quickly becomes invisible (source).
In other words, if my pitch doesn’t inspire and invigorate me every time I read it—then how can I expect it do the same an agent—someone who sees a heck of a lot of cows everyday?
I have been pretty fixated on trying to contact as many agents as possible over the last couple of months but I think I it’s time to take a break from the ‘send’ button. Instead, I’m going to play a little. Have some fun. Think outside the bag. And in doing so, write a query that makes me fall in love with my manuscript all over again.