My Self-Publishing Experiment: THE COVER

First off, let’s be clear: I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I’M DOING. However, I spent enough time waiting for boys to call when I was 15 (note to teen self: they never do) to know when it’s time to stop doing the same thing with literary agents. That’s right, I have decided to embark on […]

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Seth Godin’s Purple Cows for Queries

I finally figured out why writing query letters sucks (and I mean aside from the repeated stick-in-my-chest rejections): boredom. I have sent out twenty slightly-modified versions of the same query letter as of last week and frankly I’m tired of it. In fact, I think I may have a brown on my hands. According to […]

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Literary agent webinars: dream makers or advantage takers?

I received several notices about webinars offering ‘exclusive’ access to literary agents in my email this week. I’m not sure whether to be excited—or irritated. When I was fourteen my mother made me an appointment to see a modeling agent. The agent’s name was Dyan and after taking my photo and measurements she apparently decided that […]

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Literary Rejection: ‘Own it’, says Miss Snark

I was recently rejected by a literary agency. It went something like this: “The pages you sent are well-written and enjoyable, but unfortunately, J did not connect to the story as much as she was hoping to, and so she will not be offering representation” Of course, this happens a lot these days but this […]

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The Joy of the Nightmare of Querying

Vanilla Ice said it best. “Love it or leave it you better gain weight, You better hit bull’s eye the kid don’t play.” Okay, that actually makes a lot less sense than I remember rapping as a teenager, but the key here is that there are some things that I really hate doing and writing query […]

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The Succesful Query Letter: doing the opposite of everything I have been ever been told

Because sending emails with missing attachments, pocket updating my Facebook status with such as gems as ‘Jackie is  slkdjfsldf’ and broken links on my LinkedIn account weren’t enough I have recently been introduced to a whole new arena of potentially damaging electronic embarrassment: the query letter. Misspelling agency names, classifying my work in the wrong […]

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Never say aliens told you to write it and other query advice from Chuck Sambuchino

I used to think that, querying was like that time I went to a wedding in mom’s Fluevogs and got a matching set of oozy, cheese-grader blisters on my heels ten minutes into the ceremony: painful, but endurable (with enough complimentary champagne). I was wrong. Apparently, a more appropriate metaphor would be if I had followed […]

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