where deadly meets fabulous
My mother has started making hats out of old sweaters. When I suggested she start a blog about her repurposed creations, my mom responded by scrunching up her nose like I just gave her tickets to an Eminem concert. “Why would I do that?” she said. I tried to tell her about all the amazing wool […]
Read MoreI wrote a memoir manuscript once. It wasn’t very good. I could tell when one of the teen readers I work-shopped it with scrunched up her nose and said she just didn’t connect with the voice. Years later I finally understand what it was lacking. It’s the same thing that makes ‘evil-doing’ characters into ones that […]
Read MoreI finally figured out why writing query letters sucks (and I mean aside from the repeated stick-in-my-chest rejections): boredom. I have sent out twenty slightly-modified versions of the same query letter as of last week and frankly I’m tired of it. In fact, I think I may have a brown on my hands. According to […]
Read MoreI received several notices about webinars offering ‘exclusive’ access to literary agents in my email this week. I’m not sure whether to be excited—or irritated. When I was fourteen my mother made me an appointment to see a modeling agent. The agent’s name was Dyan and after taking my photo and measurements she apparently decided that […]
Read MoreI was recently rejected by a literary agency. It went something like this: “The pages you sent are well-written and enjoyable, but unfortunately, J did not connect to the story as much as she was hoping to, and so she will not be offering representation” Of course, this happens a lot these days but this […]
Read MoreVanilla Ice said it best. “Love it or leave it you better gain weight, You better hit bull’s eye the kid don’t play.” Okay, that actually makes a lot less sense than I remember rapping as a teenager, but the key here is that there are some things that I really hate doing and writing query […]
Read MoreBecause sending emails with missing attachments, pocket updating my Facebook status with such as gems as ‘Jackie is slkdjfsldf’ and broken links on my LinkedIn account weren’t enough I have recently been introduced to a whole new arena of potentially damaging electronic embarrassment: the query letter. Misspelling agency names, classifying my work in the wrong […]
Read MoreI used to think that, querying was like that time I went to a wedding in mom’s Fluevogs and got a matching set of oozy, cheese-grader blisters on my heels ten minutes into the ceremony: painful, but endurable (with enough complimentary champagne). I was wrong. Apparently, a more appropriate metaphor would be if I had followed […]
Read MoreEvery cloud has a silver lining—or, in this case–a set of bare, chiseled abs. Entrenched in the dreaded manuscript-flog-phase I have spent the last few weeks researching agencies, compiling query letters and then receiving rejections from said query letters. And though it can be a little disheartening to read an inbox full of “Its […]
Read MoreThe only thing worse than getting dumped by your boyfriend right before the holiday is getting dumped by your literary agent. I know, I have experienced both. My three-year long long relationship with a certain BC-based agency was terminated earlier this month after the agent representing me decided to retire. At least that was the […]
Read MoreThe Canadian Arts & Fashion Awards Blog
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Book reviews, the occasional rant, and more
